So I've been back in Winchester nearly a week now, and I'm feeling a lot more positive about everything. But we'll get to that later, because I have more pressing issues to discuss.
Now, everyone has heard of drink driving. We know it's bad. We know that it's also bad to steer with one hand, and for your other hand to be doing something that requires concentration, like being on the phone, or smoking. Today, I witnessed a boy racer and all his mates in their little Peugeot 206, thinking they were the dog's bollocks. Driver Boy takes one hand off the steering wheel, obtains a can of Stella from his mate and drinks it. While driving. Humans make me really sad sometimes.
However, humans also make me really happy. Today I also witnessed a couple aged about 17/18 I'd say, walking a dog. Not only was it the cutest dog I've seen in a while (ball o fluff with a little cheeky face!), they were creating a soundtrack for it. As it walked. So everything this dog did: peeing on trees, sniffing a bit of rubbish, suddenly became an epic tale. It was utterly fantastic and really made me smile!
I will talk about my work another time, for now I am just going to go and do it.
Later!
Friday, October 2
Friday, September 25
Recounting Tuesday
So my last night at the Pav Tav was very eventful. I'm not going to go into the more personal things on here but I want to write down a lot of it :)
I had so much energy that night; even when we were all downstairs I was jumping around. It started off just Heather, Lisa, Amy and I, and we decided to go down to the beach to find Kris and Gandey. Just as we got to the beach, they had set off in another direction so we went back to the Pav Tav. Total wasted journey but the sea is so beautiful at night - that continuous swelling of inky black just holds so many mysteries and possibilities (as well as used condoms and tampons).
Back at the Pav Tav, I overheard a conversation in the toilets:
Girl 1: If your third finger is bigger than your middle finger then it means you're more likely to be gay, it's a genetical thing. It's my personal belief that it's a genetical thing.
Girl 2: Yeah but it's my general belief that if you like people of the same sex you're gay.
Girl 1: Yeah but it's also a genetical thing.
I like having something to listen to while I'm peeing and they happily obliged. It did take all my self restraint to not just shout 'GENETICS! IT IS CALLED GENETICS NOT GENETICAL!' but I managed to restrain myself.
The freshers had just started to arrive in Brighton and I took full advantage of that. At one point when I was a little too drunk to stand up, I sat on the floor with a couple of friends and was soon joined by a girl who had just moved here from Belfast. I wasted no time in telling her that I could say without a doubt everyone in the vicinity fancied her, myself included, and we had a bit of a conversation about how everyone in Brighton was so much friendlier than where she was from. We then spotted a boy who looked a lot like Edward Cullen and fairly forced him to sit with us. Bless him, he looked so terrified but we wouldn't take no for an answer: we just continued to shout 'Edward! Over here! Edward!' and patting the ground beside us until he sat with us. I can't even remember what his real name was, but I had a little dance with him later.
Back in the club, I was surprised at how the effects of the one cup of wine I had drank lasted so long. I was about 3 hours into the night and still fairly drunk. It was packed, and then Pendulum came on. I have a feeling the majority of my injuries from that night resulted from the Pendulum - Prodigy - Chemical Brothers - Innerpartysystem schedule that followed. My brand new white shoes got totally ruined and my hair was tangled beyond belief (I had to cut a little knot out the next morning) but it was utterly fantastic. This, I thought to myself, was what clubbing in Brighton was about. I was dancing with people who wanted to dance, and we were all pressed together in a mass of bodies moving as one, but entirely separate.
Inevitably, my ankle collapsed under the strain of constant jumping like a lunatic for 15 minutes, and I spent the rest of the night outside, slowly sobering up and experiencing the drama that comes with a good night out. Luckily, I didn't end up in a fight or cry at any point, so all's well that ends well.
Awesome sendoff. Later!
I had so much energy that night; even when we were all downstairs I was jumping around. It started off just Heather, Lisa, Amy and I, and we decided to go down to the beach to find Kris and Gandey. Just as we got to the beach, they had set off in another direction so we went back to the Pav Tav. Total wasted journey but the sea is so beautiful at night - that continuous swelling of inky black just holds so many mysteries and possibilities (as well as used condoms and tampons).
Back at the Pav Tav, I overheard a conversation in the toilets:
Girl 1: If your third finger is bigger than your middle finger then it means you're more likely to be gay, it's a genetical thing. It's my personal belief that it's a genetical thing.
Girl 2: Yeah but it's my general belief that if you like people of the same sex you're gay.
Girl 1: Yeah but it's also a genetical thing.
I like having something to listen to while I'm peeing and they happily obliged. It did take all my self restraint to not just shout 'GENETICS! IT IS CALLED GENETICS NOT GENETICAL!' but I managed to restrain myself.
The freshers had just started to arrive in Brighton and I took full advantage of that. At one point when I was a little too drunk to stand up, I sat on the floor with a couple of friends and was soon joined by a girl who had just moved here from Belfast. I wasted no time in telling her that I could say without a doubt everyone in the vicinity fancied her, myself included, and we had a bit of a conversation about how everyone in Brighton was so much friendlier than where she was from. We then spotted a boy who looked a lot like Edward Cullen and fairly forced him to sit with us. Bless him, he looked so terrified but we wouldn't take no for an answer: we just continued to shout 'Edward! Over here! Edward!' and patting the ground beside us until he sat with us. I can't even remember what his real name was, but I had a little dance with him later.
Back in the club, I was surprised at how the effects of the one cup of wine I had drank lasted so long. I was about 3 hours into the night and still fairly drunk. It was packed, and then Pendulum came on. I have a feeling the majority of my injuries from that night resulted from the Pendulum - Prodigy - Chemical Brothers - Innerpartysystem schedule that followed. My brand new white shoes got totally ruined and my hair was tangled beyond belief (I had to cut a little knot out the next morning) but it was utterly fantastic. This, I thought to myself, was what clubbing in Brighton was about. I was dancing with people who wanted to dance, and we were all pressed together in a mass of bodies moving as one, but entirely separate.
Inevitably, my ankle collapsed under the strain of constant jumping like a lunatic for 15 minutes, and I spent the rest of the night outside, slowly sobering up and experiencing the drama that comes with a good night out. Luckily, I didn't end up in a fight or cry at any point, so all's well that ends well.
Awesome sendoff. Later!
Pity Party
So things haven't been too exciting recently. I started off today with a bit of a pity party: tonsilitis, broke a nice plate, hit my knee really hard, realised how many guys I've been ditched by recently, ache all over, crappy orange juice, Dean dumped Rory on Gilmore Girls, Veronica Mars got dumped, have to pack for uni, don't have as flat a stomach as Eliza Dushku, am not HayleyGHoover, don't own a MacBook Pro/iPhone, can't change hair colour at will like Tonks.
But then, I watched a few YouTube videos, read a few blogs, complained to my step-mum Maria and took a few painkillers and suddenly life doesn't seem so bad. I am one of the few people who enjoy things like ironing, and take a lot of pleasure in sinking my hands into sheepskin rugs. I can cheer myself up with something as simple as re-painting my nails, and I feel very lucky that such little things can make me happy.
I am having a really hard time regarding men at the moment, and I don't really feel like posting the details on the internet, but I am looking forward to getting away from Brighton drama. This time tomorrow I'll be on my way back to Winchester where things are significantly less complicated. I am going to miss my Brighton friends (although most of them are going back to uni anyway), my parents, my brothers, my uncle, aunt and cousins, the Pav Tav, the beach and being able to drive my mum's car. But I really want to make it work this year. I'm going to work my ass off with uni stuff, earn a bit of money and take my driving test. New Moon comes out in November and I've got NaNoWriMo to look forward to, and fun times with my housemates. I had a couple of months at the start of uni when everything was working out, but since then it's been pretty crappy, and I'd like to remember why I started uni in the first place.
I kind of wish I lived in America though sometimes.
Later!
But then, I watched a few YouTube videos, read a few blogs, complained to my step-mum Maria and took a few painkillers and suddenly life doesn't seem so bad. I am one of the few people who enjoy things like ironing, and take a lot of pleasure in sinking my hands into sheepskin rugs. I can cheer myself up with something as simple as re-painting my nails, and I feel very lucky that such little things can make me happy.
I am having a really hard time regarding men at the moment, and I don't really feel like posting the details on the internet, but I am looking forward to getting away from Brighton drama. This time tomorrow I'll be on my way back to Winchester where things are significantly less complicated. I am going to miss my Brighton friends (although most of them are going back to uni anyway), my parents, my brothers, my uncle, aunt and cousins, the Pav Tav, the beach and being able to drive my mum's car. But I really want to make it work this year. I'm going to work my ass off with uni stuff, earn a bit of money and take my driving test. New Moon comes out in November and I've got NaNoWriMo to look forward to, and fun times with my housemates. I had a couple of months at the start of uni when everything was working out, but since then it's been pretty crappy, and I'd like to remember why I started uni in the first place.
I kind of wish I lived in America though sometimes.
Later!
Wednesday, September 2
Music that grows
So recently I've been listening to a lot of music I wouldn't normally listen to. My iTunes mainly consists of single songs by artists, and I've been trying to fill in the gaps with albums. I'm giving Radiohead another chance and am actually really enjoying In Rainbows. Thom Yorke is a bit weird, not in a cute or interesting way, but in a truly disturbing way, which is putting me off a little. I feel I haven't really given Radiohead a proper chance, so that's what I'm doing now.
I've also rediscovered my love for Bloc Party. I've only just got round to acquiring Intimacy and it is absolutely fantastic. I listen to them most days, but I'm having a real kick at the moment. I love how they play around with rhythm and basically just experiment with music. I feel they're very underrated, and you have to give them a real listen to properly appreciate them.
I've also been listening to a lot of Yeah Yeah Yeahs, and my next project is to familiarise myself with the entire No Doubt discography, which is a bit of a mission and a half! I can feel a lot of long walks with my iPod coming on. I much prefer listening to music than watching the TV, and I've been making a conscious effort to turn off the rubbish I've been watching, and am now limiting myself to Desperate Housewives, Doctor Who and that new Jamie Oliver one where he's in America. I just prefer listening rather than watching.
Okay, I have a driving lesson in half an hour which I'm fairly nervous about, so I should probably go and get ready for it. Later!
Currently listening to: Friday I'm In Love - The Cure
I've also rediscovered my love for Bloc Party. I've only just got round to acquiring Intimacy and it is absolutely fantastic. I listen to them most days, but I'm having a real kick at the moment. I love how they play around with rhythm and basically just experiment with music. I feel they're very underrated, and you have to give them a real listen to properly appreciate them.
I've also been listening to a lot of Yeah Yeah Yeahs, and my next project is to familiarise myself with the entire No Doubt discography, which is a bit of a mission and a half! I can feel a lot of long walks with my iPod coming on. I much prefer listening to music than watching the TV, and I've been making a conscious effort to turn off the rubbish I've been watching, and am now limiting myself to Desperate Housewives, Doctor Who and that new Jamie Oliver one where he's in America. I just prefer listening rather than watching.
Okay, I have a driving lesson in half an hour which I'm fairly nervous about, so I should probably go and get ready for it. Later!
Currently listening to: Friday I'm In Love - The Cure
Thursday, August 20
Vortex in the bedroom
So 2 blogs in one day, wow! I'm trying to blog as often as possible, not out of some sense of obligation (as noone reads this anyway), but to preserve memories and thoughts that I have.
After I watched Desperate Housewives today, I did Davina's superfit workout (which I've started doing every day), and although I can't yet do the full 40 minutes, only 20, I'm really starting to feel the benefits. Ideally I'd like to get to the stage where I can run flat out for a few minutes and not be worried about my asthma. I get very paranoid about safety, especially at night, and I'd like to be able to know I can run away from any dangerous situations. The last time I had to run from a situation like that I got totally out of breath and suddenly the danger wasn't being caught, it was having an asthma attack, so I had to stop running. My lungs deserve better!
Mum and I then went to my uncle's house, which is always an experience. He and my aunt have four sons ranging in age from 1 to 13 so it's a bit of a mad house but I love my family. They got back the results of their house's feng shui assessment and apparently they have a vortex in the bedroom which was taken very seriously. I don't really understand feng shui, but it all seems a little ridiculous.
Wow.. I've just had to stop my train of thought as my cat has actually deigned to sit on Maria's lap. She's been so distant recently, only occasionally allowing people to tickle behind her ears that this is a major step forward! I love her happy face >.<
I went to an acoustic night with Kerry tonight to see Gazz play, he was supporting Dave McPherson from InMe. It was a nice chilled out night; Gazz has a lovely voice and I always enjoy hearing him play. We stayed for a couple more acts but got bored and wandered up to Sainsbury's where I debated for a while over whether to buy sushi or not (not) and surveyed the selection of white wine. I don't drink much, but when I do it is white wine :)
It was so lovely spending some time just Kerry and I, we rarely hang out just us. I am going to make a conscious effort to try and have more one-to-one time with friends, it's nice to have a proper chat with people.
Later!
After I watched Desperate Housewives today, I did Davina's superfit workout (which I've started doing every day), and although I can't yet do the full 40 minutes, only 20, I'm really starting to feel the benefits. Ideally I'd like to get to the stage where I can run flat out for a few minutes and not be worried about my asthma. I get very paranoid about safety, especially at night, and I'd like to be able to know I can run away from any dangerous situations. The last time I had to run from a situation like that I got totally out of breath and suddenly the danger wasn't being caught, it was having an asthma attack, so I had to stop running. My lungs deserve better!
Mum and I then went to my uncle's house, which is always an experience. He and my aunt have four sons ranging in age from 1 to 13 so it's a bit of a mad house but I love my family. They got back the results of their house's feng shui assessment and apparently they have a vortex in the bedroom which was taken very seriously. I don't really understand feng shui, but it all seems a little ridiculous.
Wow.. I've just had to stop my train of thought as my cat has actually deigned to sit on Maria's lap. She's been so distant recently, only occasionally allowing people to tickle behind her ears that this is a major step forward! I love her happy face >.<
I went to an acoustic night with Kerry tonight to see Gazz play, he was supporting Dave McPherson from InMe. It was a nice chilled out night; Gazz has a lovely voice and I always enjoy hearing him play. We stayed for a couple more acts but got bored and wandered up to Sainsbury's where I debated for a while over whether to buy sushi or not (not) and surveyed the selection of white wine. I don't drink much, but when I do it is white wine :)
It was so lovely spending some time just Kerry and I, we rarely hang out just us. I am going to make a conscious effort to try and have more one-to-one time with friends, it's nice to have a proper chat with people.
Later!
Citrus and albums
So my parents are back now, and as glad as I am to not be in an empty house any more, it is still difficult living with them. Mum and I watched two episodes of Desperate Housewives this morning; she is catching up with the ones I've watched while she's been away and it's so difficult to not blurt out what's happening in my timeline!
Yesterday I just tidied up the house more and played a LOT of Sims 3. On Tuesday night I was standing in the DJ booth chatting to Matt, he put on a Radiohead song which I found I actually loved, so I've got over my unfounded prejudice against Radiohead and downloaded their most recent album, and I'm really enjoying listening to it. I've actually got into listening to entire albums recently; seeing how they are formed and the thought processes.
I listened to two of the songs from Muse's new album yesterday, and honestly I don't like them. If prompted as to my favourite band, Muse will always be my answer as they are just so epic, but I'm a little worried that this new album will be disappointing.
I am sitting on my little spot on the sofa with my mum in her spot next to me. Every time Desperate Housewives breaks, she looks at me and goes 'ooooh!', which I've just pointed out and now every time she does it we laugh. I love these little moments with her. She just started eating an orange and I always forget how much I love the smell of citrus. It reminds me of being outside in the spring, lying on the grass and reading a book. I'm not entirely sure how citrus has become entwined with that particular memory, maybe she was eating an orange then as well. My cat Gretel hates the smell of citrus though, so she steers clear of me whenever I've eaten or drank anything citrusy. Apparently all felines hate citrus, maybe it means danger to them?
My friends have just introduced me to the joys of FarmVille on Facebook and I can feel my social life slowly being controlled by my harvesting hours: 'Oh sorry, I have to go home now, my wheat will be ready to harvest and I don't want it to go bad.'
On that note, my raspberries are ready to harvest. Later!
Currently listening to: 15 Step - Radiohead. I love that it's in 5, but it makes it difficult to dance to.
Yesterday I just tidied up the house more and played a LOT of Sims 3. On Tuesday night I was standing in the DJ booth chatting to Matt, he put on a Radiohead song which I found I actually loved, so I've got over my unfounded prejudice against Radiohead and downloaded their most recent album, and I'm really enjoying listening to it. I've actually got into listening to entire albums recently; seeing how they are formed and the thought processes.
I listened to two of the songs from Muse's new album yesterday, and honestly I don't like them. If prompted as to my favourite band, Muse will always be my answer as they are just so epic, but I'm a little worried that this new album will be disappointing.
I am sitting on my little spot on the sofa with my mum in her spot next to me. Every time Desperate Housewives breaks, she looks at me and goes 'ooooh!', which I've just pointed out and now every time she does it we laugh. I love these little moments with her. She just started eating an orange and I always forget how much I love the smell of citrus. It reminds me of being outside in the spring, lying on the grass and reading a book. I'm not entirely sure how citrus has become entwined with that particular memory, maybe she was eating an orange then as well. My cat Gretel hates the smell of citrus though, so she steers clear of me whenever I've eaten or drank anything citrusy. Apparently all felines hate citrus, maybe it means danger to them?
My friends have just introduced me to the joys of FarmVille on Facebook and I can feel my social life slowly being controlled by my harvesting hours: 'Oh sorry, I have to go home now, my wheat will be ready to harvest and I don't want it to go bad.'
On that note, my raspberries are ready to harvest. Later!
Currently listening to: 15 Step - Radiohead. I love that it's in 5, but it makes it difficult to dance to.
Wednesday, August 19
Substances
So I live in Brighton, which means that a lot of the people I know take drugs. Some smoke weed on a regular basis, some take ecstacy and MDMA, some take prescription pills that aren't theirs, some snort a lot of coke, thankfully I don't know anyone who shoots up (I hope). But yes, I am in the kind of city where people roll spliffs on the bus. They do heroin in parks and leave the syringes in bushes, and they will happily take pills off anyone.
I understand that alcohol is a drug too, but it made me really happy to see one of my more 'hardcore' friends out tonight, drunk as a skunk but with nothing else in his system. His pupils weren't dancing, his eyes weren't bloodshot, and he wasn't shaking. He was just drunk. I get that for a lot of people, alcohol is a problem. In comparison to the dangers presented by a lot of drugs (prescription included), alcohol is good. Alcohol is a depressant, not a stimulant, and if drunk in moderation, it does nothing to the heart rate, it doesn't have a severe effect on the brain, it doesn't cause hallucinations. I like alcohol (even though I rarely drink it).
There have been various nice guys, who just take shitloads of drugs.
Those drugs just masked them. It made them people I didn't want to be around and didn't really like. I just wish that they could see they don't need them, that they are so much more than just the drugs, and that really, people would like them more if they didn't pollute themselves.
Just saying. Later!
I understand that alcohol is a drug too, but it made me really happy to see one of my more 'hardcore' friends out tonight, drunk as a skunk but with nothing else in his system. His pupils weren't dancing, his eyes weren't bloodshot, and he wasn't shaking. He was just drunk. I get that for a lot of people, alcohol is a problem. In comparison to the dangers presented by a lot of drugs (prescription included), alcohol is good. Alcohol is a depressant, not a stimulant, and if drunk in moderation, it does nothing to the heart rate, it doesn't have a severe effect on the brain, it doesn't cause hallucinations. I like alcohol (even though I rarely drink it).
There have been various nice guys, who just take shitloads of drugs.
Those drugs just masked them. It made them people I didn't want to be around and didn't really like. I just wish that they could see they don't need them, that they are so much more than just the drugs, and that really, people would like them more if they didn't pollute themselves.
Just saying. Later!
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